LG2N:tonight we have a WORLD EXCLUSIVE we have been granted the very first interview with Doctor Conrad Murray since his court date and we have been given permission to interview him at his practice,i will be doing this interview as something come up with the other interviewer and a member of the jackson family so here we go..
(waiting at reception).....
(Receptionist young african woman)(chewing gum)...
LG2N: im here to see the good Doctor
RCT:(african tone) which docta,u want?
LG2N: ...A witch doctor? no Conrad Murray our peeps got talking for a exclusive,im the hired help.
RCT:me erd bout tiss funnyman from Gracie,let me buzz de docta,and when u go in tell im dat baby momma numba 8 needz sum benjamins for talkin to iz patients!
LG2N:i will (forgets instantly)
RCT:what iz ur name Lunchbox?
LG2N:Lunchbox...?oh my...erm just call me T from GK to int CM about...
RCT:enuff!!! big man sed enter
LG2N:ok thank you Baby momma number eight
RCT:ma name is Crystal u puff....hey no cameras!or microphones,pen and pad only
LG2N:thats not a microphone its a instrument of pleasure
RCT:yeah me know it,but e wanted to frisk ya
(enters room)..(Murray on Mobile)
(Murray waves to take seat while he finishes conversation on phone).......
CM
:" Me tellin u da troot mister Jones,me can use Poppyfull to diagnose a common cold,u come in tommorow here,and me will make u fell betaa in no time,u will be partin in da caribean by easta!"....
"ok me see u then,peace brudtha"....Me sorree,ello again GK!
LG2N:hey Doc,long time no see(gets up does the fist touch)...ive just brought a pen and paper today like you requested no hidden microphones or anything,ok lets get serious and get down to business...
CM:ok me man,but listen up,portray me in good light because me losing patients left right and center,plus me ad to hire da upstairs out to a porn company to pay me court bills
LG2N:Oh youve answered your own first question i was going to ask you,are you physic?hahaha
CM:no but me do it part time,you phone me 555 CMDREAMS and i will predict ur future and iff u live long
LG2N:(Totally not understanding anything)oh cool,can you read dreams aswell i had this one the other night..(interupted)
CM:me sorree to interaput but iz been a long day,can we talk bout questions
LG2N:o yes,can you prescribe something for me though,while im here?
CM:of course,the gud docta iz in da house,wats up brudtha?
LG2N:well at night i get really cold because its winter,u know ...and i need a hot water bottle so my feet dont freeze,but i keep getting laughed at for my dirty secret,can you prescibe me something better?
CM:wat iz a boddle of hota water,a drink?
LG2N:no i use a rubber device to keep myself warm at night
CM: me think u need to go upstairs they got rubber dummys that you could use instead,tell em Conny sent u ,u will get ten percent off any blow up doll plus a free magazine,if it persists da cold drink sum soup before bed!or take this(injects needle into LG2N)
LG2N:OWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW (sobbing what was that conrad?)(blubbering)........
CM:it no worry man ,me a doctaaa me can give u anything,it was a soup injection,chicken!
LG2N:(still crying)im not a chicken,it was just cold and unexpected
CM:no me man chicken soup injection,u will be warm tonite
LG2N:OH thanks i suppose(sulking)
CM:u dont ave to be patient of dis practice,to get sum good vibe u here,just pay some of me court fees,about half will do1
LG2N:ok checks in the post,i will let leonard rowe post it,you should get it 1st class....
LG2N:how come there is bodyguards on the door?who are they?why is there a picture of Frank Dileo hung up on the wall behind you?
CM:(shifting eyes)ere me man take dis while i talk
LG2N:(GULP) Swallows white liquid)....
CM:dis iz a private security firm hired,GEA or AGE or sumthin me forget,frankie i think iz in there pocket as a boss of da company connected phony of sumthin?me bodyguards were given to me afta da plan went down by Phillip Randy and Gay directa,i sleep beta at nite knowing they got me back.
LG2N: i dont know what you give me but it tasted salty like????
CM:me keep a jar of it here for afta babby momma sesions as a rub,its a great moisturiza
LG2N:?????
LG2N:i would like to check your books to see if there is any wrong doing,is that ok?
CM:of course me nothin to hide but da troot
LG2N:what?
CM:errs da boks
(LG2N opens them up,pages in the doctors diary are all filled with patients names rubbed out and pictures of naked women in there place and a date and time).........
LG2N:Wow......mrs Rosabella needs a good seeing to on the 8th ugly face though,Samamtha on the 9th good body face like a wet fish,ericina on the 10th wow Conrad the list goes on what gives?
CM:me sorree iz a sham a sham me tellin ya!me total perv,me jackin off now under da table chattin to u, me got a sex problem,me do it with pigs,me ave 28 babby mammas with 708 babinos in total,elp me please,?
LG2N:well i will tear this page up in your diary,it doesnt look too appertising,what is she like 60?
CM:which one?.....
LG2N:(points )
CM:yeah she not really like that,me ave a mug shot of err wanna see it
LG2N:no thanks,moving on,there was talk of MJ crazy fans gunning you down on the steps of the court house,i watched all day,i enjoyed it,it was like a episode of a reality show
CM:me add a bullet proof vest on,me got da word from da street dat a dude called kissmanger was on to me,he got a group of fans and had rocket launchers ready to blast me on da steps,me come in by helicopta our pilot Mr T said he didnt wanna fly no more and jumped out,me landed it on the grass,jumped into me SUV and blocked da jaxson family in at da courthouse,lata on inside i was trapped inside the toilet for 2 hours while TMZ were reporting something outside the door,Joe had Majestic smash the door down,he slipped and got his jerry curls wet in me bog,me was chased by da family in da court,Mrs Kath brought a pair of silva balls and was crunching em to me,i was threatened with threats,finally some loony got me some time to i could clear outathere?
LG2N:it was a crazy day ,what loony?
CM:word got to TMZ that some woman was hiding in da bush then da white trashcan,me seen her i think on me way out trying to reload a rocketlaucher
LG2N:crazzies,how did you escape?
CM:me dressed up a conrad murray lookalike in da bathroom,then i put a hat on,no one could tell me from my double,it worked !
LG2N:what happend totally in court,we only saw extracts from the scenes?
CM:me sat there drawing a picture of da judge when Jermaine jackson bursts in da door,e starts singing let get me serious or sumthin,and sumthin about his sweetness,then da court threw out dat Papa Joe because he brought in Old man Lary and his friend Leonard,it was mad house!
.............
(Girl bursts into room with a large bump)
girl:this iz ursss Conny me not making no more for you this iz my tenth this month,me tired of this)
(Conrad gets up,rubs his own belly)
LG2N:WTF?(thinking to himself,is he eating these kids)
CM:Sumthin come up me man but listen take this before you go...
(gives LG2N another liquid)
CM:me appreciate all you doing on GK to elp spread da good word of greed,corruption and ..i mean all ur efforts ,me will give u anotha exclusive after april 5th as dats the 2nd show in da murray mysteries we filmin,but let urself out me need to sort out diss babby mamma!
LG2N:(slurring speech,disoriented,)(Murray helps him to his feet)
(LG2N stumbles out of room)collapses..................
.........HAS MURRAY ENDED LG2N'S LAST INTERVIEW EVER.......STAY TUNED.....